december

i walked by myself, feeling a bit self-conscious about the whole idea

it's not that i wanted to go alone

i didn't

but that's what happens when 

your husband has left you 

and your only child is a teenager and doesn't want to go

i'm not happy, not at all

and it shows

and it feels

i imagine the sadness oozing from my pores

visible

to anyone who cares to look 

but i'm sure they don't.